Cuddle-inator
by Danzinora Switch
Summary: Tony has a habit of turning things into teddy bears. Clint seriously doesn't care and makes sure Tony can avoid awkward mornings when the team is out on location. Fluff! One-shot. All canon pairings apply.


**A/N: This is a fluffy piece that doesn't really go anywhere but should make you giggle and feel warm none the same! :) Don't mean any hate- just normal team ribbing. I ship the canon relationships (Pepper/Tony, Clint/Laura, and Natasha/Bruce) with platonic bromances abounded. I do not own the Avengers or Age of Ultron. Enjoy! Review!**

* * *

In Tony's opinion, Barton looked dead on his feet.

As in, full-on-put-zombies-to-shame dead on his feet.

He figured that was how the assassin would ultimately go- he'd be standing, maybe leaning against a wall, and he'd die; only nobody would know it because he would look the exactly the same as he did now.

"You do know what sleep is, right?" Tony said bluntly, watching as Clint picked things up from around his room. If one could even call it a room- Barton had the sparsest apartment out of all of them; it was like he barely lived there. The only thing in the bedroom was a dresser and a bed, and the man went about organizing the dresser.

"It's a phase most humans use to recharge," he continued.

"I'm familiar with it," Clint tossed back.

"Ah, good! So you know Romanoff's been breathing down my neck about making you sleep."

"Why you?" Clint frowned.

"See? That's what I said. But she thinks I have some kind of authority over everyone, here, at least since it's, you know, my tower and all, and I'm not about to just go and prove her _wrong-_ "

"I'll sleep later, Stark," Clint interrupted.

"Nope. No can do. You see, I may own the tower, but if I walk outside with you still awake Romanoff's going to own _my neck._ So I am going to stay here until you fall asleep."

"Seriously?" Clint said dubiously.

"Yep."

Clint stared at him, and then shook his head. "This is ridiculous."

"Seeing as it's my neck on the line? I don't think so." Tony pointed his finger at the bed. "Now lie down."

Clint's eyebrows rose. "You _are_ serious?"

"I'm as serious as Morgan Freeman's voice. Lie down!"

Clint looked at him incredulously, then smirked. He walked over and stretched out on the bed. "Fine. I'm _lying down_."

"Great! Now go to sleep."

"You're just going to stand there and watch me sleep?" Clint pointed out.

Tony crossed his arms.

"That's incredibly creepy."

"I'm glad you agree. Now hurry up, I have other things to do."

Clint smirked. "Really? I bet you'll fall asleep before I do."

"Not a chance, Sleeping Beauty. I've pulled double all-nighters with nothing but my equations and some electric shocks to get me through- that's right, not even coffee," Tony rocked back on his heels.

"Oh yeah? I stayed up three nights in Siberia because I had a concussion and hypothermia- both conditions where _sleeping kills_."

Tony snorted. "Big deal. I stayed up through _five_ back-to-back press conferences- that _didn't_ involve me!"

"Ohhh, you think that's marvelous- I sat through a meeting where Fury, Coulson, and about 14 techs argued over whether or not the new ultra-lite Kevlar uniforms should have _buttons_ or _zippers!_ "

"Fine!" Tony snapped. "It's on."

Clint just grinned.

Tony thought he stood there for an hour. Clint just relaxed against the headboard, staring at the wall. He had to be sleeping- just with his eyes open.

"I'm not sleeping, Stark."

Creepy spy.

Tony's legs ached. He looked around the sparse room but there was nowhere to sit except the other side of the bed. Well, sitting down wouldn't be cheating. He just had to stay awake.

Clint watched amusedly as Tony crossed over and sat next to him. "What?" the billionaire groused. "Not all of us have the _luxury_ of lying in a bed during this competition."

"We do now," Clint pointed out smugly.

Tony ignored him.

Okay, so he sat on the bed. No back support. Okay, so he stretched out. There was nothing wrong with that during the contest. Dang, this was actually pretty comfy. Before he knew it, Tony dropped off.

Beside him, Clint smirked. Amateurs. Now that Stark was out of the picture he could go back to his business.

He moved to get out of the bed… and promptly dropped into dreamland.

* * *

When Clint awoke he frowned.

Something was curled up next to him- kind of _around_ him, and partly on top of him. Trying to recall his memories from the night before, he opened his eyes.

Well. It certainly wasn't every day one woke up with Tony Stark wrapped around them like an amoeba.

Clint smirked. This was golden. He would kill for a recording right now. Maybe he could reach his drawer…

As he shifted, Tony tightened his grip. Clint grunted. Okay, that was kind of painful. He started poking Tony in the arm. "Wake up, sleepyhead."

Tony made a noise and curled in closer. "Go back to sleep, Pepper," he mumbled.

Clint bit his tongue to keep from laughing. "I'm not Pepper."

Tony froze. "Please don't be Rogers, please don't be Rogers, please don't be Rogers," he whispered furtively. He finally summoned up enough strength to peek one eye open.

Clint grinned. "Mornin', sunshine."

"Oh thank God," Tony dropped his head on Clint's stomach in relief. A split second later and he failed upwards, shrieking. Clint finally lost his battle and burst out laughing.

"C'mon, Stark, I'm not _that_ bad- there are many worse faces to wake up to in the morning."

"Yeah, yeah," Tony grumbled, trying to cover for his girly scream. "Barton: I will pay you whatever you want to never mention this incident again."

Clint blinked. "Seriously? Geez, Tony, it's not that bad."

"I will also throw in a new bow, and some more arrowheads."

"What the heck, Tony?" Clint rolled out of bed and approached him. "So I was your teddy bear for a night- big deal! You're making it out like we had sex or murdered somebody!"

Tony scrunched up his face. "Thank you, for that imagery." He hastily moved for the door.

"Stark-" Barton beat him to the door and put his hand out. "Seriously- what's the big deal?"

"Gee, Barton, I thought you would jump at the offer of unlimited cash and new weapons-"

"-I'm trying to stop you from giving things away that aren't _necessary_ ," Clint explained.

Tony finally stopped shifting around and looked at him.

"I mean this, Tony: I don't care about it. It's not such a big deal."

"Well," Tony straightened his shirt. "Okay then." He looked around and finally brought his eyes backed to Clint. "Good morning."

"Good morning," Clint replied.

Tony indicated the door. "Shall we?"

"We shall."

Clint opened it and they strode out.

* * *

Clint confirmed it with Pepper later that day, just to figure out why Stark was so embarrassed of that particular trait. She just chuckled.

"He's a hugger. He won't admit it but he _always_ ends up cuddling something in his sleep- pillow, another person, his toolbox… you name it." She winked at him. "He says he got zapped by a cuddle-inator," she whispered conspiratorially.

Well, with the newfound knowledge, Clint saw no reason to let the man suffer. The entire team had been on multi-day mission before, and often times had to bunk unusually. Tony had awakened next to Banner once and had to answer to Bruce's embarrassed, but polite "Um… what are you doing?" which was somewhat more bearable than Thor's confused "I do not recall consuming any ale last night." Nat would kill him if he ever tried to snuggle up to her, and Tony would likely kill himself if he awoke to spooning Captain America.

So, Clint made sure he was the available teddy bear each night.

He honestly didn't care. It really didn't bother him, and at least this way Tony could avoid the awkward explanations the following morning. He was pretty sure the rest of the team was unaware of the habit (the two previous occasions were considered flukes) and he worked to keep it that way. The system worked. Everything would be fine.

* * *

"You know, if everyone's going to stay here, some are going to have to bunk together," Laura told him.

He started laughing at the impossible image. "Yeah, that's not going to sell," he chuckled darkly.

She did have a point, though. At first things looked dicey, but Thor left, only to be replaced by Nick Fury. Like anybody was going to bunk with him.

Well, if the kids shared a room that opened up the guest bedroom and one of their rooms. Laura spotted a growing 'thing' between Nat and Banner, but if those two bunked together then it would leave Tony and Rogers together, which could not happen. They were trying to _prevent_ the end of the world, after all. Fury could take the couch. In the end Clint worked out that Nat and Laura could share the master bedroom, Bruce and Steve would take one of the kid's (Steve insisted that Clint have the guest bedroom, since it was his house and he'd already been kicked out of his own room) and so Clint and Tony would share the guest room.

The fact that Tony didn't say anything about him leaving Nat with his wife indicated that the genius was aware why Clint shuffled things around as he did.

Of course, the whole point of that plan was to make sure things went smoothly. Two giggling kids with a camera at 6 in the morning should not have been part of the problem. Nor should the photos have been passed around at breakfast.

Nat winked at him as he entered the room, leaving Tony to claim the other pillow as his own. Clint stopped and stared at everybody. "What?"

Laura shrugged and sipped her coffee. "At least the great Tony Stark and I can talk about what a great teddy bear you make," she mentioned with a smile.

Clint shrugged and grinned. "Everybody needs a little TLC."

The smiles broke and breakfast resumed. When Stark shambled in later, nobody said anything beyond commenting on his zombie impersonation. The normal team banter remained completely unchanged.

Although, if asked, Tony did stick to the story of being zapped by a cuddle-inator.


End file.
